almost
so there’s this guy. and i know what you’re thinking, there always is. but this one’s different. he has touched me in ways my boyfriend of almost a year, never did, and i suspect, never could.
he’s the first guy i like. and it’s a dangerous, powerful like that terrifies and frustrates me at the same time. his moments of tenderness touch me to the core, but there’s a double edged sword: with every sweet gesture he makes, a part of me weeps at the fact that he could’ve been mine and we could’ve had something. my friend pointed out the thing that was missing in my first relationship: chemistry and compatibility. with this guy, neither is lacking.
tonight, he called me on skype and we talked so comfortably and easily and when it was over, i was angry because i could’ve had that all the time. it’s extremely frustrating to be dangled a carrot and know you can’t have it because time’s run out. i’ve learned that almost hurts a hell of a lot more than the impossible.
